I pray that all dogs actually DO go to heaven, because if any of them could, it would be her. I could think of no other befitting way for Bernie to die but at home in my arms. I was scheduled to take her to the vet on 4/23 but as fate would have it, she died at home. Her last night was rough, I was tired, she was tired and we spent most of the night fighting desperately for air. She died at 6:48 AM, right in my arms....
I miss her SO much, its like a HUGE part of me is gone. I still listen for her nails clicking across the floor, her running out the room sideways when I come home, her in the bed with me kicking me.
The worse part of this is watching Pickles grieve... The first night he carried her pillow around the house crying and that was the roughest thing I've had to endure. Its like we're lost without her, although she was a small dog, she was big in spirit.
The entire family felt this one, friends/acquaintances/ex-boyfriends were ALL impacted in one way or another by Bernie's life. She had a fan club all her own. What brings me comfort is knowing that if all dogs DO go to heaven, she's with my mother who I KNOW welcome her with open arms and said "Bernie Baby" in a way that only she can. I know they're looking down on me and Pickles but DAMN I really can't take any more losses right now, this is too much...
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