Monday, April 23, 2012

Happy.....

If someone had told me this time last year that at this time this year I'd be so happy I would have told them they were lying.  Its not ONLY about my new relationship with D, but its about a peace that I have that everything really IS going to be alright.  I've been thru alot, but the point is I made it THRU and I know its nothing but God's grace, peace and a few praying and supportive friends who kept me afloat.  I have alot to be happy about. 

But on to Mr D.... He will be here FRIDAY!!! It seems like we've both been waiting for 4/27 at 11:12 for the entire month.  I am SO happy and honored that he's taking the time out of his schedule to spend a few days with me and I cannot wait to see him.  We both are beyond excited about this visit but I've already told him to let's not plan to do too much, let's just enjoy our time together.  I don't want him feeling as if he has to wine and dine me, I'm just excited to be with him.  I deserve this, no correction, we BOTH deserve this.... 

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Love

So I'm in love.... I've loved people before, been loved before, but now that I've met him I don't believe I've even been in love before. It's not that wreckless, gut wretching, think I'm the greatest thing in the world kind of love... Its grown up love. I can be open and honest with him, be exactly who I am and he WANTS that, we talk about everything and anything and he's very supportive of me.

I love him. He's everything that I've prayed for and God's gift to me. I'm convinced that God sent him to me and if we had tried to do this on our own, it would have been messy. We both have marriages that we are working our way out of so we are being respectful of that. I am SO ready for this, I'd marry him tomorrow and I mean it.

Thank you God for your gift and for his obedience to you.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

This is nice....

Being grown sometimes has its benefits. I have reconnected with a childhood friend (I mean he must have known me and my family since I was around 10) and its been BEAUTIFUL! We do alot of smiling through the phone and he's exactly what I've been asking God for. He's kind, loving, funny as heck, sweet, protective, summertime FINE, loves his family AND God, loves and respects my family and knows me already. We used to crush majorly as kids but we both agree that it would have NEVER worked before because neither of us were ready. But now, we are VERY ready.

This is nice and SO grown up. The family has co-signed it (down to the nieces) and its nice having someone who gets me and wants to! I'm ready and open God for whatever this is going to be. But for now it this is SO nice...

Monday, March 12, 2012

WOW!!

Wow and wow again is all I'm going to say about my latest friend. OMG wow God, you really are amazing.....

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Divorce

I'm meeting with an attorney on Monday. I received my official release and confirmation Sunday in church (yes I was laid out on the floor, I'm glad yall weren't there, you would have been mad). It not that I desire in any way shape or form to reconcile, its just at times it's rough stomaching the current state of things. I'm cool with this, I really am. I'm ready to get on with my life, to love freely, to have guilt free "relations" (yes there will be relations!) and just close this chapter in a book that probably should have never been opened.
Happy pre-birthday to me. I may take FL with me so I don't have a complete emotional meltdown on Monday. She'll snatch me by the scruff of my neck and whisper a few choice words in my ear to get me back on track!

Yes I will be having a divorce party, attendance is MANDATORY!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Its Not Easy to Be Me....

This song expresses how I feel most days.... UGH!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRz4FY0ZcwI